I’m so irritable and I don’t feel good and I just want to go lay in my bed and watch movies all day. Maybe even all week. I want my blankie.
So. Today I woke up with many feels. I figured, Tumblr, open minded place lots of opinions. Maybe, it would be cool to read up on other people’s experiences, feels, ect. Post-Abortion. Though mine happened many years ago it still definitely weighs on my mind. At this point in my life I don’t completely regret my decision because a) I was 15 years old, mentally unstable and in no way ready to raise a child & b) because the father wouldn’t have stepped up I just know so. Any way, so. All I seem to find is nothing but Anti-Choice posts. And yes, I say anti-choice instead of pro-life…why you ask? Because 90% of “Pro-lifers” are dicks. Now, with that I will say a large portion of Pro-Choicer’s misuse and abuse our right to an educated decision. I in no way believe that it should be used as a form of birth control or a multiple use back up option. BUT, as someone who has been there I’d just like to share my experience. No matter what you may think, then and to this day, I love my unborn child. Unconditionally, fully, with my whole heart. Why did I choose this road for us? I chose this road because I know what it’s like to grow up feeling unwanted by one parent. I know what it’s like to grow up in a split family. Why didn’t I choose adoption if I loved my baby so? Because PERSONALLY I didn’t feel that was the right choice for us either. How many “Pro-Lifers” have given a child up for adoption? Please enlighten me. Do you know how hard it would be AT 15, and ALREADY MENTALLY UNSTABLE at that, to carry a piece of you for 9 months…to grow it, cultivate it, and then hand it off to someone else that you barely know?!? The thought to weigh on your mind for the next 18 years, who REALLY is raising my child, what beliefs are they installing, what values? Do they beat my child, has my child been neglected or sexy abused? Will they know who I am, do they wonder? Are they hurt by that? Will we ever met again? Are they even alive for Christs sake?!?!? And finally, an unmarried, jobless, uneducated 15 year old GIRL carrying a 24 year old mans child, alone. Living off of her parents, not learning the correct parenting skills or how to fend for herself in this world much less her baby. Now you tell me which sounds more monstrous. And also, followers, if this angers you…SHOVE IT UP YOUR ASSHOLE AND UNFOLLOW, NO FEELS HURT HERE TODAY.
Someone’s probably in love with you right now, even though you think you’re boring and stupid and smell bad most of the time, someone probably saw you last week and wiped their sweaty hands on the insides of their pockets and thought about your body under your clothing and about how you would look asleep in their bed